I actually got a response back!

Instead of the copy and paste rejection letter, I actually got something of a critique back from one of the literary agents I queried! Problem is, I’m not entirely sure how to use it or how to piece it out. Maybe I’m just stupid, but could I get some thoughts? Here it is:

“Thank you for submitting ERASE ME. While the premise is interesting, the dialogue and the voice don’t really feel authentic to me. I want to be able to just sink in and be with a character, and in a story like this which depends so much on the motivation and anxieties of your protagonist, I want to experience these things with her, not just be told about them. ”

Thing is, if it depends on her motivation and anxieties, aren’t you experiencing it with her? And also I thought the dialogue had been the most authentic part, and I had reviews from others that they thought it unique. X.X So…how do you really know? And as to authentic…I could see that, because often times, that which is copy and pasted from a real event feels fake, or hard to believe. Not sure how to fix that…

*sigh* It’s at times like these I really wish I had, like, a writing mentor, and not just my own anxiety ridden self.

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3 thoughts on “I actually got a response back!

  1. Perhaps guiding the reader through her reactions to the anxiety She feels? The tensing of muscles, the tightness in her chest, the fumbling for something steady. I haven’t read your story yet, but it’s on my list for next week. Perhaps I’ll have something more helpful to say.

    1. You’ve been so helpful already just by taking the time to comment! You mean show not tell. That’s what I thought I had done, because I usually try to show the feeling rather than just saying it. “She was anxious.” XD Yeah, no.

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